“Sub-0 J: 14 Straight Wins, No Loss Detected”
League: No Bums Dynasty League
Matchup: Sub-0 J (Killa) vs Himmy Butlers (Kooks)
Result: 7 – 2 Victory | Record: 12-6 (4th Place) | Regular-Season Win Streak: 🔹 14 Games 🔹
📊 Matchup Summary
| Category | Sub-0 J | Himmy Butlers | Winner |
|---|---|---|---|
| FG % | .466 | .462 | ✅ Sub-0 J |
| FT % | .872 | .804 | ✅ Sub-0 J |
| 3PTM | 59 | 58 | ✅ Sub-0 J |
| PTS | 562 | 468 | ✅ Sub-0 J |
| REB | 160 | 193 | 🏀 Butlers |
| AST | 129 | 118 | ✅ Sub-0 J |
| STL | 39 | 35 | ✅ Sub-0 J |
| BLK | 19 | 9 | ✅ Sub-0 J |
| TO | 75 | 50 | 🏀 Butlers |
Final: Sub-0 J 7 – 2 Himmy Butlers
❄️ Storyline: Ice in the Veins, Smoke in the Kitchen
It’s been 476 days since Sub-0 J last tasted a regular-season loss (Week 7 of 2024 to Gamma Squad).
Since then, he’s rewritten the No Bums Bible — racking up 14 straight wins, avenging a championship defeat in Week 1 2025 against the Speedsters, and now casually sweeping the Himmy Butlers back into the service closet.
The Butlers came to play but forgot one thing — you don’t bring a tray to a blizzard.
Sub-0 J didn’t just win — he polished the silverware with their box scores.
🧊 Maxey Season: When the Ice Melts, It’s Liquid Gold
With Anthony Edwards sidelined, Killa simply turned to Tyrese Maxey, who played like he just found out rent’s due every day:
134 PTS | 23 REB | 39 AST | .467 FG
“Next man up” isn’t a motto — it’s a religion.
Meanwhile Jordan Poole, fresh off Twitter slander, decided to make the Butlers his career therapists:
86 PTS | 12 3PM | .958 FT | Ice in the eyes of the doubters.
They said Poole was a bum? He just turned the bathroom into a sauna.
💪 Depth Wins Dynasties
Even with Dame, Edwards, and Sochan out, Sub-0 J still outscored the Butlers by 94 points and doubled their blocks.
Kawhi Leonard and Jaime Jaquez Jr. played like they were auditioning for permanent contracts:
- Kawhi: 52 PTS | 11 REB | 6 STL | 100 % FT
- Jaquez: 65 PTS | 20 REB | .579 FG
And that’s without mentioning rookies like Derik Queen and Mouhamed Gueye quietly filling stat columns like ghost writers on a Grammy track.
🧹 How to Handle a Butler (101)
- You don’t talk to a Butler — you ring for him.
- You don’t argue with a Butler — you tip him after he cleans up your mess.
- You don’t fear a Butler — you hand him the trash bag and tell him to take it out back.
Sub-0 J did exactly that.
The Butlers showed up in pressed suits; they left folded in the laundry bin.
“Himmy” ain’t Him — he’s Hymn, a sad song sung every Sunday after losing to Sub-0 J.
⚙️ Stat Science
- Steal Differential: +4 — Turned defense into transition.
- Blocks: 19–9 — paint sealed like Fort Knox.
- FT %: .872 — Championship-level consistency.
- Win Streak: 14 — Dynasty Infrastructure Status Confirmed.
💬 Killanomics Quote of the Week
“We don’t sweat losses — we freeze them.
We don’t mop the floor — we make the Butler do it.”
🧭 Rest-of-Season Outlook
Sub-0 J is still the league’s north star — cold, predictable, and blinding when you look too long.
Every week, the roster adapts: rookies flourish, veterans steady the ship, and Killa’s data-driven lineups choke the life out of opponents before Sunday night even arrives.
University of Fantasy Ball 
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